In a Rut (Day 9)

I have been in a rut lately.  Not emotionally, physically, financially, or any other one a person usually thinks of when a person says they are in a rut.

Today’s word of the day is:


As of today, I am exactly 9 months postpartum and I have been in a fashion rut for the past 3 months.

After two children, I have realized my body shape has changed.  Furthermore, my taste in clothing has shifted.  I don’t want to ascribe to the “mommy uniform” of yoga pants, which seems to be what many moms my age are wearing.  That said, I also don’t feel super thrilled about dressing older than I am – I am in my early thirties still, after all!

I would prefer to be dressed in cute skirts, and nice, modest tops (which still allow me to nurse).  However, designers don’t seem to favor making clothes for mothers, with small children, who need to be ready to bend over and scoop up wiggling children at a moment’s notice.  When you throw “modest nursing tops” into the mix, you can just throw the towel in on a search right there.

This is what I wore to church today – Little Man had no desire to “stand with Mommy for a picture”.  I love the length of this skirt, but the pattern makes it difficult to find a good top.

Mom fashion is tricky – I don’t want to hang out all over the place, but I also don’t want to blanket my shape in tented garb (how I feel I am dressing these days).  I must also be prepared to sprint after small children, which for me, renders heels completely impractical.

Furthermore, I am in desperate need of a hair cut.  But, unlike days of old, where I woke up and knew exactly what I wanted done to my hair, I am struggling to figure out exactly what style I want for my hair.  I am used to a cute, professional-looking bob, but after a terrible haircut experience (two years ago), I am gun shy about letting anyone touch my hair.

On top of that first world struggle, I also have to keep in mind I am setting the example for both my children.  My son will base his impression of women off how I not only carry myself, but also how I dress, and more importantly, how I love and respect myself.  My daughter will base much of her self-image on how she sees me – not only in the clothes I wear, but in the manner with which I speak to myself, about myself.

My son insisted on taking my picture, after my husband took the others.  This was my favorite picture, and captures the essence of how I want to present myself to my children – beautiful, happy, modest, confident, and loving.

So, I want to feel well-put together, modest, beautiful, and confident in my appearance.

Yet, I am in a rut.

Little Miss is not in a rut.  She used her charm to convince a grandfather-aged Mass attendee behind us to give her his watch after Communion.  She simply pointed to his watch (her newest skill), batted her eyelashes, and the next thing I knew, she had someone else’s watch in her mouth.  Because her parents’ watches were not good enough…

So, tonight, I am linking up with A Blog for My Mom in an effort to continue trying to work my way out of this rut.  If you get a chance, head on over to read some other fabulous bloggers writing about their Sunday Best!


14 thoughts on “In a Rut (Day 9)

  1. I love your quote, “So, I want to feel well-put together, modest, beautiful, and confident in my appearance.” This is EXACTLY what I want. I don’t want to look frumpy and exhausted, but I also don’t want to look like I’m trying to be 16. Where is the middle ground?!?!

    I’ve found I love the fit and flare dresses at Land’s End for church. I have 2 that I rotate and pair with different accessories/sweaters to change it up.

    And…this resource could go either way. I didn’t purchase it, but I checked out the “Dress Your Truth” information. It gets a little new-agey (which was irritating), but I told myself it was just dressing to fit my personality.

    At any rate, it helped me think about my style. Maybe it’s something that might help you on your quest as well. 🙂

  2. You are SO beautiful!! And your skirt and shirt look modest and great as well. I’m not much of a fashionista myself. My fashion style is called SIMPLE. And I think the picture your son took, with your big beautiful smile, is how he’s going to remember his momma. He won’t remember what you wore. It’s the joy and love you share through your actions and your smile that he will remember most!!

  3. You can do it!!! Let me know if you need any guidance or input – I love love love finding stuff that works for other people 🙂 Solid color basic tops are so so hard to find these days, because everything that’s good quality is crazy-expensive, and everything cheap is super-thin and will get holes or totally pilled in no time… So frustrating! I generally lean towards patterned tops with solid skirts because I’m always spilling things on my tops and that way they don’t show stains 😉 Some friends of mine are opening up a LulaRoe shop soon and I’m really excited to try some of their stuff – I feel like a pencil skirt (Cassie maybe?) plus their Irma top (it’s a Dolman sleeve top that’s longer in the back so you get bum coverage) is the perfect mom uniform because it’s nice and stretchy but easy to layer a tank under for nursing!

    1. I have loved looking at LuLaRoe clothes, but so far have not enjoyed looking at the prices (although, to be honest, they aren’t outrageous!). And, I agree – you have to pay for quality, and that is where things get difficult – I’m just being cheap. 😂

  4. You are a wise mom. I love that you are conscious of the fact that your kids will be watching to see how comfortable you are in your own skin. They are like little sponges and contentment is huge.
    I also feel your pain on the hair issue. Practical but stylish is good but to find the right person to cut it can be traumatic.

  5. I love this! Your thoughts on how you want to set the example for your children — I completely agree. I avoid letting my daughters hear me say anything disparaging about my body, and I always try to let them see me take pride in my appearance, BUT I’m pretty sure they heard me say at least three or four times this weekend, “I hate my hair!” :/ And knowing the way I am forming my sons’ first impressions of a woman.. wow. Really inspiring.

    You look great! Keep up the good work!

    1. Thank you so much for the kind words!

      I have just started to say, “I really need a haircut!!” And then, stating objective things, like, “it’s really too long/thick/etc.”.

      And, it is so HARD to refrain from being critical about ourselves in front of our children (or anyone else, for that matter). Way to go in making that a priority for you – not letting them hear anything negative, that is!

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