Human nature is fickle. One day, we love something; the next day, we hightail away from our initial pleasure, dreading another reminder of that particular love.
As I consider our fickle nature, and how quickly and easily we run hot and cold, I am absolutely amazed by God.
God knew we were fickle creatures when He created us. He knew that one day we would embrace Him, and the next, we would want to run away, muttering how difficult He is being by placing rules and restrictions on “our” free will.
As Ginny asserted last spring, we live in a hook-up culture, a culture which is more focused on the individual, rather than the lasting quality of togetherness. And, a hook-up culture can be lonely – as much for those looking to hook up, as it is for those struggling to make lasting commitments. We live in a time where we are quick to toss away something when we no longer see the use of the item.
God has created some pretty fantastic things in His existence.
He’s created our world, the angels, animals, even fickle humans. He’s also given us a list of rules which, contrary to popular belief, are not merely suggested guidelines.
He’s also given us some pretty wonderful and lasting institutions.
Consider the Catholic Church. Although it is not a perfect institution (since it is run by fickle humans), it has stood the test of time since the time of Christ.
He’s also given us lasting vocations, or callings in life – like, Holy Orders or religious life…
… like marriage.
G.K. Chesterton is credited with saying,
This phrase goes against the grain. It should force us to analyze our marriages which may be faltering. It encourages us to do better – to do what we need to do to give our marriages the utmost attention it deserves.
Recently, my husband and I were discussing our marriage and what drew us to each other as potential spouses. I shared with him that, while I am most definitely not perfect, my husband was the first person to ever challenge me to be the best version of myself. His love and encouragement made me want to be a better person – for him, for the people around me, and more importantly, for myself.
When I entered my marriage, I knew it was a commitment for life. I recognized at the time our marriage would not be without struggle, because anything worth doing is worth doing right – which means elbow grease and commitment would need to be applied before running for the hills. In fact, running for the hills is simply not an option.
Looking around, more marriages end in divorce than I care to consider. Perhaps worse, couples are simply choosing to refrain from the commitment that comes with marriage. Couples shy away from the notion of “happily ever after” as an antiquated institution. Or, they throw in the towel when they realize that forever is a really long time!
But, I am going to challenge all of us – whether we are in solid or rocky marriages – to remember the bright eyed dreams as we approached our wedding days.
Take a moment to recall what drew you to your spouse in the first place.
Think about the reason you entered in to your vows – the commitment between you and your spouse, and the third party of your marriage – God.
Remind yourself what you were hoping to see come to fruition in your marriage, how those ideas may have shifted, and which ones are important enough to get back in the forefront of helping mold your union.
Because you, and your spouse, are beautifully, wonderfully, fearfully made – and, you are both made in the image and likeness of God.
Your marriage – the two of you, and God Himself – deserves to know every hill, valley, ravine, and peak of your journey as a couple. Your marriage deserves to have the opportunity to withstand the test of time, and to shine as a bright example in the face of our current hook-up or toss-away culture.
So, this weekend, take some time to reflect on your marriage. And, let your spouse know how much they mean to you – whether in person, over the phone, an old-fashioned love letter, or via e-mail. Shower your marriage with some attention.