A couple months ago now, I was tagged by Jessica at Pinot Noir and Prayers as part of the #RockingMotherhood challenge. The goal? To celebrate the ways I am rocking motherhood. Well, I forgot I was tagged in this challenge, until Alicia’s own post last week. And, like Alicia, I struggled with this challenge.
Let me get real, y’all…
Most days, I don’t feel like I am rocking motherhood. at. all.
Blogging allows me to create a sort of fantasy some days – a blogger’s fantasy of the kind of mom I want to be – using pictures such as this to depict what a great housekeeper and mother I am:
But, let me give you a brief glimpse of how my house really looks – aside from the neatly cropped or completely staged pictures… the way it looks three out of five days of the work week – not to mention Sundays, when I haven’t done dishes in two days:
When I look around my house, I see abject “motherhood failure“!
My children watch way too much television, play way too much iPad, and spend entirely too much time being forced to play independently.
Yet, I am aware enough that housekeeping and dish-washer are not the extent of my motherhood. My inability to play imaginatively with my children does not count in the failure, or success, of my motherhood.
So, how am I Rocking Motherhood?!
I encourage social interaction – even if I am “busy,” I am never too busy to talk to my children, or to encourage them to talk. This may have inadvertently resulted in having talkers, but I’d rather have chatter boxes instead of silence.
I am teaching them the priority of faith – my children are learning our priorities in our family are as follows: God, Family, Country. The One who sustains us is God, and His rules (10 Commandments) and prayers are more important than other activities.
I am teaching flexibility – they know that, aside from Church on Sundays and a weekly therapy appointment, nothing is more important than being flexible. We are lucky in that we don’t have school… this year. But, I am setting the stage so that, the older they get, the more they understand some obligations are important, and when we are able to relax, our family will relax with the best of them!
It is okay to own up to mistakes, failures, and imperfections – my son already has a budding perfectionist streak. I am not a perfectionist anymore, and the last thing I want my son to do is stress over his imperfections. So, since nobody is perfect, and it is an unattainable trait, I make sure they know it is okay to not be perfect. Furthermore, they are learning that while perfection isn’t possible, being the best person we can be is an admirable character trait. So, we still try our hardest.
It is okay to apologize, and to try harder next time – I have a short fuse at times (specifically when I have to repeat myself, or when I am running late). But, in the end, I know my children are picking up and learning from me, and therefore, I apologize for my shortcomings. And, I commit to try harder next time – something they see me do, and my son routinely reminds me that the goal is, “to make God smile!” Furthermore, with a new day heralding a new beginning, they are learning that every day is a new shot to try again, and to do better.
I treasure my motherhood – at the end of the day, I want my children to look back and know that I enjoyed them. I love their little personalities, their intellect, their wit, and who they are becoming, even if I am scared for them taking the world by storm. I love their strong-willed natures, and the way they just seem to know what they want. I am tickled when they display nurturing tendencies and empathy. We laugh together, we cry together, we build each other up, and we do everything together – they are my little shadows, and as exhausting as it can get, and as messy as my house can become, I am treasuring who they are becoming – the leaders I suspect they will become as they get older. We do everything together, which means they are learning every little thing about their world and how it interacts with our family.
So, today, I am trying to reach out to the other mothers – the ones who may feel as though they are failing in their motherhood. You. are. not. failing. As St. John Bosco is credited with saying, “It’s not enough to love the children; it is necessary that they are aware they are loved.”
If you are making your children aware they are loved, then you are rocking motherhood.
If I am making my children aware they are loved, then I am rocking motherhood.
And, that means I have done my job as a mother…
Now comes the fun part of today’s post – I get to nominate some other fabulous bloggers to participate in this #RockingMotherhood challenge!
I am nominating:
Rosie at A Blog for My Mom
Sara at To Jesus, Sincerely
Amy at Prayer Wine Chocolate
Leslie at Life In Every Limb
Allison at Reconciled to You
The “rules” are simple:
- Thank the blogger who tagged you, and provide a link back to them;
- List 10 things (plus, or minus) you believe make you a good mother;
- Tag some other bloggers to participate in the challenge.
Let me add, I won’t be upset if the bloggers tagged choose to not participate. However, I would love to see us spreading a little bit of “Mommy love” these days – it is so important we are real with ourselves, and recognize the tremendous effort we are putting in, not just ensuring our children are surviving, but also thriving!
If you haven’t been tagged, don’t remain silent – I’d love to hear how you are Rocking Motherhood in the comments below!